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me myself and i
ivan
16th year of existence
25th of april 1988
taurus
pinoy ako!
lunsod quezon
black
bookworm
news geek
laughing gas
S H O U T O U T !
mga stig na blog
ed
ianne
lheng
daphanie
dana
kent
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dustin
mga sites
mu
idol
cnn
diliman prep
friendster
my songs
rainbow
forevermore
will i ever
before i let you go
let me be the one
change is the only constant thing in life
There was a time in my life
when I opened my eyes
and there you were
You were more than a dream
I could reach out and touch you, girl
that was long ago
There are some things
that I guess I'll never know
When you love someone
you got to learn to let them go||
When I dream about you
That's when everything's alright
You're in my arms, here next to me, forever
When I dream about you, girl you never go away
Just close my eyes , wait for my dreams
Cause I still love loving you||
How can I get you to see
that I'm falling apart
since you've been gone
I can never be sure
I could ever let go
your love is much too strong
There are some things
that I guess I'll never know
When you love someone
you got to learn to let them go||
When I dream about you
That's when everything's alright
You're in my arms, here next to me, forever
When I dream about you, girl you never go away
Just close my eyes , wait for my dreams
Cause I still love loving you||
There are some things
that I guess I'll never know
When you love someone
you got to learn to let them go||
When I dream about you
That's when everything's alright
You're in my arms, here next to me, forever
When I dream about you, girl you never go away
Just close my eyes , wait for my dreams
Cause I still love loving you||
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Thursday, June 24, 2004
Ngayon palang ako magsusulat SA diary Kong ito. Although noon KO pa ginawa ito. Akala KO nga e, dine-delete Na ito Ni kuya kiko, kasi inaayos nya ito dati, ung mga files Na Hindi naman kailanagan, binura Na nay, kaya akala KO, wala na ito. Thank god at hinmdi pa anamn nya nabubura. Well anyway, bukas, exams Na namnin at ahindi pa din me bayad SA worth P8000 Na tuition KO, ewan KO nga ba Kung makaaka- take pa KO ng exam KO tomm. Tapos, ngayon Na man mismo, e namomobrelema kami, kasi ito si auntie, and e gusting pumunta ng bayad for the nth time! E, kaso, alam mo naman sa bahay,, sobrang dumi diba? Tapso, itong si kuya jon2 e, kagabi alas-dose nanaman umuwi, ang tagal na nyang ganyan, siguro since bumalik, sya mula kay papa Jessie, probably 3-4 months ago. At ito halos, nagpupuyos nanaman SA galit si mommy,
Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay buhay!
Hindi KO Na alam!
ANG gulogulo Na din ng luv lyf KO, pero d KO naikikiwento, kasi better be safe than sorry diba? Baka kasi mabasa ito ng ibang tao. Mahirap Na diba?
O pano, hannggang ditto muna, wala Na din naman akong masasbi sayo, kasi namomobrlema ako ngayon asin ang dami Kong problema!
Hindi KO din alam Kung kelan muli ako sayo makakasulat……………….
Sige paalam Na ha! Bye!
- Ivan
Posted at Thursday, June 24, 2004 by onivelnyu
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Friday, June 25, 2004
How ironic! Monday nanaman! At ngayon nananman uli ako magsusulat sa diary kong ito. Wow! Grabe as-in so many things have happened the passed few days, at siguro kulang ang gabing ito para masabi kong lahat iyon. Sisimulan ko sa ganito………….. I still remember it all to well……………………..It was Thursday, and Bio ang test naming, (this is the nth time that I’ve been telling this shit), tapos na akong mag test, at palabas na ako, bigla akong tinawag ni edel, and he asked me how to solve the radioactive dating problem, e kaso, ako ay nagmamadali na ako, kaya binigay ko na lang edel, yung scratch paper ko, nung nakaalis na ako, nakita pala ni mam PARAJES na tinitingnan ni edel, ung scratch na bingay ko sa kanya, thinking, na KODIGO yun, she seized it along w/ edel’s paper . so, in short, I tried to explain to MRS. PARAJES, everything, but she wont listen, instead she gave our paper to the guidance office, in short, na case laetter kami, pinatawag si mommy, at ung parents ni edel, and everything for me, went tyo hell as-in patongpatong yung mga problema ko. And something amazing happened, just this afternoon, I was once and for all, called in the guidance office, it was the first time that I’ve talked w/ maam Santos about that situation. Grabe! Ang bait nya!, she granted as pardon, and agreed to check our paper, on the condition that noting like that would ever happen again on her class, take note, on her class only. So, un tapos na yung araw ko sa DPS, at alam mo ba, 1st time ko na maglakad papuntang bliss, as-in from New Era, straight to Philcoa, e naglakd ako, along with Rhian, kasi sobra ang traffic as-in SOBRA!. Nd just now, dumating si mommy, sayimng that she already paid Dalogdog P14,000 and daddy ay nagpadala na daw ng worth P18,000! As-in ! oparang, kung kelan mawawalan na ako ng pagasa e, biglang may lumitaw na liwanag ! alam mo yun?! Praise be to God! O pano? Hanggang ditto na lang ha? Bye! Goodnight!
- Ivan
Posted at Friday, June 25, 2004 by onivelnyu
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Saturday, June 26, 2004
Hello! Howz lyf? Aus namn, so far…………. Ang mga happenings? Marami e, first, meron kaming play sa English, sa march 14 2003 gaganapin sa auditorium Production manager ako, si Sweeden ang directress, si Joshua ang Rameses, si Lorenzo ang Moses, la lang……… kasi, kanina ang aming 4th rehearsal and everything go well nbamn, but we have the same, problem bout, his playing the role of Hotep, and he doesn’t even attend the rehearsals, since the 1st one, he naver showed up, until now, but still, hindi pa din sya talaga nag prapractice ng tunay ah bazta! Anywayz, si Nerissa, wala lang…… “close” lang kami, la lang……. , she wrote me a letter, asking an advicve ‘bout her friend, basta un na un! Tapos, after ng practice, we headed straight for FCM(Fairview center mall) and played Battle realms, 8 kami, 2 0n 2 0n 2 on 2 ang teams, si Edel&Joshua, Rhian&Lorenzo, Micheal C.&Micheal L. at syempre, kaming dalawa ni genesis, talo sina Edel and Joshua the first time ever, na magkasama sila at natalo sila. Wala lang…………. O pano gotta go na ha? Bye!
- Ivan 
Posted at Saturday, June 26, 2004 by onivelnyu
Permalink
Haaaaaaaaaaay buhay! Wala na! Tapos na ang school year! Nakakamis! Kahapon nga nagangati mga paa ko kasi gusto kong lumakad, nasanay na kasi ako ng tuwing sabado, lumalakad, kasi dati lagging may practice Kapag sabado. Ayun! Tapos na ang play! Last Friday! Na move nga e, kasi supposed to be, Thursday ng 7am; e may baccalaureate mass ang mga 4th year, kaya yun na move kami ng fri. 1pm supposed to be (ulit), e kaso 1pm na kami nakarating dun kaya yun, na move kami ng 3pm, andun nga pala si kuya kiko, sabi ko kjasi manuod sya, ayos lang, kaya nga lang hindi na pasok yung mga pinaghirapan naming background kasi dapat, ipapaspok yun nila jjhay and comp. Malay ko sa mga yun kung anong pinagagawa nila sa backstage (kasi ako nasa harap, ako ang in-charge ng lights, si Marianne ang sounds) e alam mo ba! Sobrang hirap naming gawin yung mga background na yon inabot kami ng 6pm sa bahay nila Sweeden (Luzon) para lang gawin yung mga background, imagine! Tapos hindi lang pala maghagamit, angf isang background kasi, made of 6 manila paper, tapos dun pa naubos yung pastel and funds naming, dalawang anim na manila paper yun, kaya, sooooobrang hirap talaga naming ginawa yun. Well, anyway, tapos naman na yun, wala na kong magagawa,. Basta! Talagang nakakamis ung mga practice (tska yung bahay din pala ni sweeden, kasi dun kami madalas na nagprapractrice) pero, magkikitakita panaman ang lahat sa Monday p[ara sa clearance, actually dun palang ako mag tetest, kasi da whole week nuong test examinations absent ako, sabay nga kami ni Lorenzo eh! Asteeg diba, kahit papano, may kasabay ako. Haaay buhay! Nakakamiss talaga! Ngayon palang, namimiss ko na antg badajao, pano paka kaya sa april and may! Hahahahahahahahahaha! Oi! Nung fri. Din nga pala hinahanap sakin ni lynder si Joshua, e part si jo ng play, kakausapin nya sana, kasi alam mo sooooooooooooobrang laki yata nang problema nung dalawang yun. Kawawa naman, tsktsktsk, anyway! Sige, until next time na lang, k? suslat uli ako promise after nitong week na to!. Sige! Bye!
- Ivan
Posted at Saturday, June 26, 2004 by onivelnyu
Permalink
Sunday, June 27, 2004
Haaay buhay! Eto nanaman ako, nagsusulat nanaman syao, naku! Ang dami kong pinagdaanan ngayong school year na to ah! Andaming, mga 1st-evers ko. Ngayong lingo, nakapag test na ko sa halos lahat except for computer, kasi wala sa guidance office(wher I take my test) yung test paper , kaya yun, hopefully, by monady e matapos ko na talaga as-in. kagabi or shall I say kanianag 12am ay napagusapan naming m ni Marianne yung 2ngkol sa ranking, e2 na ang final results, 1st si althea, 2nd si james at 3rd si Marianne! Ganun na din ang ineexpec5t ko e, na hindi na ko makakapasok sa top 3 dahil nga kasi diba, hindi nag padala si daddy, nung examination week, kaya e2 nung fri. nga , 8 test ang tinake ko! At lahat yun walang review!, swerte ko na kung mkapasok pa ko sa tp8! Expected ko na nag na hindi ako kasali sa top 3, pero nasaktan din ako nung sinabi sakin ni Marianne, na nagpraktis daw cla, kahit papano pala, masakit din. Kaya pala, nakakuha na ko ng gold medal ko sa quiz bee sa AP nun, kasi hindi pala ako makakapasok sa top 3 namin ngayon. Masakit din pala, pero kahit na, its what god wants, wala akong magagwa. Anyway maiba ako, kanina, galling ako ng school(alam mo ba feeling ko, bahay ko na ang school!) e walang sumipot lkahit isa sa mga kaklase ko kaya yun, dumeretso n ala ng ako ng SM north at nanood ng “the Core” hindi ako nagkamali, superb! Ang film! Remindsa me of my favorite movie, Armageddon, parehas, kasi sila ng concept, the difference nga lang, ung armaggedon sa taas, ang “the Core” sa taas, gets?. Alam mo ba, nung isang araw, nag susap kami nii shirlyn, and she cried infront of me!, 1st time kong makakaita ng isang babaeng umiiyak sa harapan ko, na friend ko! Naaawa ako sa kanya, kasi sobramng mahal nya si Joshua, andjoshua is such a bad boyfriend to her! Nakakawaa! Asin! Param syang, batang umiiyak!. Alam mo sabi nmya sakin, na nuon daw, alam daw nya (1st yr) na may gusto ako sa kanya, at intentionally, lumayo daw sya, kasi mahal nya si jo! Ang sakit! Kahit hindi ko na sya mahal ngayon(yata!) e, masakit pa din. Tapos, she asked me to tell Joshua, na sabuihin sa kanya na magausap daw sila sa april 9, kasi, si jo ay matagal na syang tinatagauan! Basta mahabang istorya! Nagsimula i2 nung huling lingo ng praktis naming ng prince of Egypt. Ah basta! Un na na un! God, kayo na po bahala! Cge bye!
- Ivan
Posted at Sunday, June 27, 2004 by onivelnyu
Permalink
Monday, June 28, 2004
Wow grabe! As in 6 minutes from now, lunea na! Haha11:54PM na kasi……. Anyway, oI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahaha musta na??????????? Its been a while since I last wrote to you e?, pasensya k na ha?, medyo tinamad kasi ako eh, heheheh, let me see, hmmmmm………my last entry was on May 2003, almost 7 months agO! Hahaha! Oh well, wala nman tlga ako balak sumlat ngayun, kya lng, I chanced upon this diary of mine, while “surfing” this computer, tapos e2, binasa ko, and usual, it never fails to gicve me a feeiling, a very , very, very basta! Maganda un narmdman ko habang binabasa ko ung diary ko kaya un, nahikaayat akong sumulat uli. Hahahah! Anyway, hay nakU! Grabe andami nang nagyaroi sa lyf ko, sobra as-in, cvant believe i9it, 7 months lang ang nakalpisa, and yat, parang isang buong taon na! Hahahah anyway, e2 na, kasi 2tal mattpos na din namn na ang school year, parang e2 na din ang overall recount ko para sa ang ika-3 taon sa highschool, here goes……. Una sa lahat, ang section ko ayt Palma, isnag section na binubuo ng 28 na mga late enrolles nang paraalan, tinambak kaming lahat sa palma, ang room nmin ay ang dating chess room , so in short, hindi din nmin na tikman ang kasganaan na nattikman nang mga taga ibang pangkat sa bagong building, si Jo, micheal C., Rhian, Marianne, Camille, Lorenzo, Jamie, Karen tipones, and sori n lng yung mga nklimutan ko, prro lahat ng un ay pinalad na mapunta sa Aquino, ang mhy pinakamalaking Badjao popoulasyioon, pangalwa ang Ba;lagtas(kung nasan andun parheas si YVONNE and Shirlyn) ang kaklase ko lng na Badjao sa plma ay si cathy at si Raymond, oh yes, Mr. Sanchez, reymond sanchez. Anyway, dati 28 kami, ngayon 27 na lng kasi, si Jejomar Villanueva, ay nkipag spkan kay Jared(from Badjao din pala, nakilmutan ko) kaya inilipat sa Aquino, joke ko nga, sana ako n lng ang nkpagspkan kay jare para ako na lng ang nailipat sa Aquino, hahayha, anyway, nung 1sdt quarter, ako ang Top1 nang class, I realy focused asin, tpos nung 2nd quarter, sobrang dami ng nangyari, una, ung kaklse kong si cathy nkpagpalit ng cellphone, overnyt, 3310 nya sa 5510 ko, so ang nanyari, kinabukasan, hawak ko pa din ang 3310 nya mag papalit n sna kmi bago mag uweian kya lng, pagbalik ko sa room, Tuesday yun, P.E nmin, wla na yung telepono nya, a day after, so mga thurs. yun if im not mistaken, anfg telepono ko nman ang nawala, same room same place and I believe same person did it. Gawin daw ba akong suki!, I had no choice, believe me, but to do the FF: the next day, (im rily not sure) nagpasam ako kay Marianne and Camille sa ever, bumili ako ng 5510 ko, at 3310 ni ctahy, kasi kailngan kong palitan ung 3310 nya, tpos un, napalitan ko na nga and all’s well, kya lang nag kalechelecjhe, dahil I have to lie to the oldies(parents) kung san napunta ung pera na pindala ni daddy,. Kc kami na ngayun ang pinapadalhan strraghaight nang pera, anyway edi un naayos na sofar……ang next pala na victim ay si Cecille, ung telepono nman nya ang pinagdisketahan, ang nagbayd ay si Joann at si Elleeen.. 3rd quarter nman, actually 2nd quartr p din to, mttpos n na lang, nakilala ko ang Ragnarok, and I became hooked into this game up to now as I rtype im still thinking of playing the game tommorow afternoon, nag ka leche;eche ang studies ko, bumagsak ako sa top2 ata o 3 kasi di n ngaytoon pinaalam kong sino ang top2-3 1 lan ang alam, “Most outsatanding student”, un ang titolo ko nung 1st quarter na pagdating ng 2nd quarter ay npunta kay ysabelle cruz, nag kakasirasira na ang barkada, kanya2 na ng sama sa kung kanikanino, ako, kaming 3 n lng nila peter apin, yes! You heard it ryt, nagbalik po si Mr. apin, kasi escoda sya, kasma ni edel and genesis, kming 3 nlng nila apin, mrtinez and Galura. Ngayun nmang 3rd quarter nma I promised myself im goingto retrake my place as top student, and im currently doing everything I can to be #1 again, heheh, si Marianne pla ang #1 ng Aquino nung 2nd quarter, nung 1st quarter nman sya ang 2nd. “kuya” na ko ni Marianne at ni Camille, I have to admit I have a crush on her, si Lynder, as days go by, lalong lumalabo sya, bsta, ang hirap iexplain, e ksi ako din mismo, di ko sya maiintndhan, pero syempra, mahal ko p din sya, sya lang tlga hahahah!. Oh well, minsan, kausp mo sya ng matino, bukas, galit n sya sayo, hindi mo maintndhan, an dami n din pla nkkalam ng “secret” naming ni lynder bout dun saming mga “experiences”, ung akin ang mga nakkalalm sina: Marianne, eleen, shirlyn, Julio, ariel. And I hope, di n madgdgan pa. Pano nila nlman?, sina ariel and Julio, dahil samin ni lynder nagkukilitan kami, or rather, nagaasaran kaya un nagkbis2han, si eleen, it was a very bug mistake, my mistake, that is, dpat hndi ko n sk nya cnabi, bsta, ang gulo nya ksing tao, si Marianne, nman, close n ksi kamikya un, I tiold her n lng. As I type here, my current level at ragnarok stands at: knight, level 54, merchant level 20, at mag sstart nnman ako ng bagong swordie n may tamang built, para sa up and coming(daw!) na alternate jobs, na ang pipiliin ko nman ay crusader. Hay basta, and aming ko pang di na kikiwento, si sweeden, linligwan ako, hahah! Beliv it or not, si grace, away bati kami, ung field3p na medyo may kwenta at walang kwenta, andami!!!!!!!!!!. Pero kinakailangan ko ng tapusin kto kasi, manood pako ng porn! Hehehe, pero sana di na klasi tintamad na di nako, bka maka2log n lng ako, watcha think, diary? Hehehe J anyway, I have to go na, il write again n lng ok? Ay! Bago pla me mag tahtah!, eh ung Prom pla nmin sa February 3 2004 na, nagpalam n ko kay daddy na mag overnyt stay sa otel, manila otel tat is. Wish KO LANG EVERYTHING GOES WELL. PLS LORD, 1ST TYM KO PO TO J. By diary! I have to go na, ill write to you l8r n lng, siguro kpag tpos n prom naming hehehehe.,. byebye! Tahtah!
- Ivan
Posted at Monday, June 28, 2004 by onivelnyu
Permalink
Haaaaaaaaay buhay! Ewan ko! Actually, wala pa akong balak sumulat, dahil nga sa tinatamad ako e. alam diary, I feel rather stupid kasi dapat an tagal ko na syong sumulat, sa dami na ngyari sa life ko, haay! Ewan sige, simulan ko saganito, una, nung,holy Wednesday, that was the 1st day of the pabasa, gabi na non e, tinwagan ko si Jeremy sa bahay nila ng mga about 9 in the evening, and told him to come here,at up bliss, cause I was feeling, rather bored, imagine!9pm! edi yun, pumunta nga sya, at nagkwentuhan kami, under the full moon, dun sa may court, habang umaalingawngaw ang mga boses nila mama redden sa pasyon, he talked like we never talked before, sinabi ko sa kanya ang problema ko tungkol ditto sa pagkawala nfg cell ni kuya jon2 ung pagbenta ng cell nam,an nitong si tipos, and I asked him for an advised wether kung maganda ba ang magisa ka lang at ang iyong mga kapatid ay hindi mo kasama, sabi nya, mas maganda daw. Tapos yun, kwinento ko skya yung ngang tungkol kay shirlyn at yung kanyang relationship kay Joshua, ayun! Gality na galit at ah basta! Naawa din sya kay shirlyn! Sino bang hindi! Tapos, next naman nung birthday ko, tinawagan ko si edel, Joshua, genesis, Jeremy at kumain kami sa greenwhich at medyo na surprise si Jeremy, actually silang lahat kasi di nila alam na kasama ang bawat isa sakanila, gaya ni erdel, wala syang kaalam alam na kasama pala si Jeremy at geneseis kala, nya, kami ng 3 lang nila jo, tapos si Jeremy naman na shock pagkakita samiong apat na nakaupo sa table, hahahahah!nakakatawa sila, anyway,pakatapos naming kumain sa greenwhich,e pumunta kami sa peralta at nag laro ng command and conquer generals, and yes, kasama si Jeremy, ayun, natutu na syang maglaro,a few days later nga e, ang dami na nyang tinatanong sakin bout the game. Haay life, at bago natapos ang araw, nakatanggap ako ng “best give I ever had in my life” ika ko nga sa nagbigay sakin, tinext ako ni SHIRLYN! After almost a month(exsage!) grabe, sabi ko sa sarili ko, haaay ! buhay, inluv nanaman ako, ayun at nung Sunday nga e, kasi fri. yung bday ko, e nagkita kami sa Sagana one, dun sa may banda court, hindi ko makakalimutan ung lugar na yun,every time na dadaan ako dun, ill always remmber that day, haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay so, dumating ako dun ng mga bandang 3pm na, na ka roller skates sya, bagong bili nya nung Saturday, nagpapaalalay sya sakin, tapos as usual, nag kwentuhan kami lalo,yun grabe! Ang sarap, binilhan ko sya ng icecream na drumstick, at para din sakin, tapos yun bale, umuwi sya ng mga bandang 5pm kasi, kailangan na daw nyang umuwi, ayoko pa nga sana kaya lng, kailnagngan na nya talaga,b4 that day pala,ng txtan kami kagabi, (Saturday) tapos, inamin ko sa kanya na mahal ko pa din sya hanggang ngayon, pero sabi ko sa kanya na,hindi ko naman sya liligawan kasi nga,sa tingin ko eh,hindi pa ko ganun ka handa na mag handle ng relationship,gets?. Tapos yung mga napagkwentuhan naming nung Sunday afternoon na yun, caused me to know better si Joshua, grabe! He’s so different from the Joshua that I know!tapos if im not mistaken,nung Monday e nagtxtahan nanaman kami ni shirlyn,tapos inamin nya sakin na nkipagsex na daw sya kay Joshua ng apat na beses na! Tapos sinabi ko din sakanya na nakipag sex na din sa iasng kapampangan girl last xmas,at medyo lasing ako nun,at nagkatuksuhan at yung girl ay kabarkada ng kuya ko. Haay! ……….. ayun, medyo na bawasb yung “pighating” na raramdaman nya, nung sinabi ko yung xperience ko sa kanya, syempre, nagbago yung tiingin nya sakin,at nagbago din syempre ang tingin ko skanya. Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay life, alam mo ba, ngayon pa lanag na frends pa lang kami,she’s becoming tooooooooo demanding na, she told me na ang piliin ko daw na section ay de jesus para daw classmates kami, ta[pos pag nagging varsity daw sya e smaghan ko daw sya sa practice!!!!!!!!!!! Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay life, I eend ko na ditto, basta, bahla na, isa lang ang sigurado, pagdating ni Jeremy galling pangasinan ay sasabihin ko skanya lkahat ng ito! Sige! Bye!
- Ivan
Posted at Monday, June 28, 2004 by onivelnyu
Permalink
Tuesday, June 29, 2004
Waaaaah!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wala lang, pganatapos na to, maiintndhan mo kung bkit gn2 ang panimula ko. Before I begin, musta na!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hahahah! Matgaltgal na din, hehehe J didn’t I promised na susulat me after d’ prom?, well here it is, J heheh. Una sa lahat, nagppkas senti me ngayun, nkkning ng mga lovesongs. Ung prom?, well, it was boring for me, ganito kasi un, last Tuesday, February 3, 2004, ngnap ang prom nmin, walang pasok non, pro pmsok me, pmsok din si lyn, knbkasan, dpat may lkad kmi ni lyn, kc wla nmang psok nun, I thought kc na we should spent some quality time together, since na aalis na sya, kac gnito un, almost 2 weeks kming di nag ppncnan, den ung ngpncnan n kmi through chat sa raganarok, un, ang ganda ng bungad nya skin, aalis n daw sya dis early april, either sa US or Taiwan, tama ba nman un!? Almost 2 weeks kaung di ngppncnan tpos un pa ang ssbhin sau?. Nakakainis! Edi syempre “gumuho” ang miundo ko nun. Depressed me in short, and prang di pa sapat un, kinansela pa nya ung lakad nmin for February 4, 2004 treat ko namn, si Julio pa ang pnsbi nya, kung bkit kinansel n daw nya, “cause you were acting like a jerk” ni hndi ko lam kung panong “acting lyk a jerk” ang ginawa ko! Aaaaaaaaargh! Sobra tlga!, naiinis n ko sknya,m di k n lng sinsbi, 3rd stryk n un eh, ung 1st, nagpromise kc sya skin na kung wla daw kmi prehas ksma sa prom, kming dalawa n lng daw ang partners sa prom, she promised dat to me!, tpos ngayun, kesyo hndi daw sya ppnta sa prom, kc kesyo daw, kaartihan lng daw, ayaw daw nyang mkkkita ng mga guys w/ there over-sized tuxedos, nkkainis tlga!, kaartehan e?, pno ung prmise nya skin! Nkkainis, tpo sun na ung 2nd and 3rd strikes ung 2 wiks nming pgppncnan and ung pagkansel nya sa lakad nmin, nkkains n tlga sya. Anyway, may bago n pla me na natuklasan n laro, MU I don’t know wat MU stands for, pero isa syang MMORPG just lyk rgna, pro libre and intrnational, tipoong IRO sa ragna, un as of now, lv. 8 n me, oi! Mataas n un ah!, nde po madaling mgplvel up no! hahah!J nwei, ung rgna nman, 55 na me ung knight 90% prqa mging 56, ung swordie ko nman sa odin(odin and fenrir bgong servers) ay lv. 25 na, ggwin ko snang vit.. knight, tpos ung swordie ko sa chaos ay 39 na, ung merchant nman ay 24 na ata, medyo wla n me interes na mag rgna pa uli, unless cguro na may altern8 jobs n uli, ung MU kc libre eh. hahaha dark knight nga me pala sa MU,astig un, much better dan ragna, in terms of graphics(RO->2d; MU->3dimensional). Haaaay ang palama nman ay, hopefully top1 me ngaung 3rdQ. sa fri. p kc ang release of cards. Ung prom nga pala, ang boring kc, edi wala nga si lyn diba, edi syempre boring na, wla kming table, reservation dat is, kya nkiupo n lng kmi knla guideon, ang service nga pkla nmin nila genx and kutch ppnta dun e ung car ni jom, grbe di kmi mkahinga! Sa loob, hahaha!, nwei, msrap ung food, pro B10, tpos l8 n kming dmting, sbi ni grace isayaw ko daw sya, I w8d & w8d & w8d kc sumayaw sila ni jaden w/c is her GF, kya lng di n sya bumalik na bad3p me, wla n 2loy me naisayaw, si Camille sna at sis sis(inane) tska si catrhy, kya lng sa khhntay k o kay grace di n ko sila naisayaw. After nun pla, kc inextend ng SC ung program ‘till 1am, edi tpos na umlis kmi ng 1230 smthing npgsuapn n kpag alam ng manong – taxi ang libis, mag lilibis kmi, pro pag hindi alam, uwi n lng, e kya lng alam, kya kming 4 nila jster, Lorenzo and jome(w/c is in the front, talking all d crap he can thgink of, all d way from mnla htel to libis), ay grabe!,ang layo pla ng libis, almost 1 hour ang byahe, nmin, and to think na wlang traffic non kc, dis oras n ng gabi un ano?, hahah! Edi xempre frends na us w/ manong – taxi hahah, nkrting kami ng sta. Mesa, greenhills, EDSA!, at kung san san pa un, ay oo!, even mendiola p ata hahahah!, nwei, pgdting nmin dun, la pa sila inane, kya weve dcyded kc si enzo ay magtatake din ng test, 3rdQ knbksan n umuwi n lng kmi, kya un, ng pblik n kmi, bnaba kmi nila jom sa phlcoa kmi ni jster, blaka ko pa snang mag ragna, 22ruan k p nga sna si jster, kya lng sira aat ang aircon ng sesinet, at grabe, andami pang tao, considering na 1aomthing in the morning n aun ah!, I was spellbounded, I never expected dat to happen(actually lahaty un, simula sa hnd pag punta ni lyn sa JS), nag goto king n lng kmi, sabi ko nga kay jster, “I never thought na ditto din pala tau bbgsk”,. Hay grabe!, un nga pala. Ngpdala n pla si daddy ng pang overnyt ko, kya lng to si kuya kiko, bingay ung pera kay mama erlin, e ayaw nya, di nya me pnygan, tska wla na daw tira dun sa pndla ni dddy, kc nag bayd p daw ng tution!, ay grabe, kya just imagine kung gano ako ka bad3p habang nag proprom, andaming resons kya pra di me umatend, sakatunayan nga nag backout na me, kundi lang for a few speceial frends, w/c are ianne, jster, and gnx, I was eventually persuaded to attend the most boring occasion ive ever attended. Hay! Nakkinis tlga!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sobra!. Ang mga pumunta nga pla ay sina :sa Aquino table, jom, enzo, cmille ianne, micheal C. uy, Joanna, grace D. omega, viray, si jo?, ha! Nandun sa table ng mga maangas ng Aquino, table n ktbi ng table nmin,: ako si gnx, si jster, si micheal L. si Gideon, zerimar ata un, wilmer pasoquin ata un, aeryko, tska may isa pa ata, kc 10 sa isang table ang kalangan, sa plama nman, hiwahiwalay, sila cathy, or rather si cathy, kc hndi nya ksma si grave, nagtamo nga din kay grace un eh, prhas kmi, si Yvonne ksma sa table! HahahaJ anywei, un lng, table 56 nga pla kmi, d last table, ahahah!. I cud onli laugh. O pano, pagod n ang nmga daliri ko, katataype ng mga kasawian n dinanaas ko last wik, puro lng nman sad memories eh, paalam n l nga. Hahah! Bye, ok?, wish me luck n lng dis fri. kung ako p din sna ang #1 ng palma, hahaha. Bye ah! Cge bye!
- Ivan
Posted at Tuesday, June 29, 2004 by onivelnyu
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HA! Gitna na gitna ng linggo eh nag sususlat ako d2? Wahahaah! Haaaaaaaaaaaaay buhaaaaaaaaay………… March 31, 2004, a day to rmbber. Ngayon umalis si lyn for taiwan, 3am ata ang largada…. Haaay.. nwei, hndi tamang ganioto magsimula, so sisimulan ko na(officially), a lot of things happened since the last time I wrote to you. Hmm?… ive olredy reached lv33 at MU, started a new charcter and aloredy reched 25,(knight and elf), rgnarok? Umm.. may war of the emperium chu2 cla, d k nmn alam kung ano n yun, bsta mlpit n daw ung mga alternate jobs… daw ah…. Um… nag frfreindstar n ko?, yeah… kblng n ko s mga frndtr peeps. Hahaha… umm… nagkausap n nga din pla kmi ni shirlyn…. Actually madaming beses…. It happens lyk dis…. Every Saturday evening it became a hobby of mnine to surf the net in sesinet jan s may phlcoa, kc d whole of Saturday srdo cla, nd nyt lng sla ngbbkas, wla lng, trip ko lng, kc uko mag stay s bhay… L nd shirlyn would usually be online also… umm.. un, nagkakausp kme….. nd un nga…. “ngkaalman” na, actually you know what?, she kept onm sending mixed messages b4, as in, alm m un?, d k maiintndhan…. D ko 2loy alm kung ano gagwin ko…. *PAUSE* dmn! Ihate what im doing right now!, aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarghg! Hndi ako mkpg concntrate, kc cnclat ko to ngaun, fter kong mbsa ung inwn sking stuff ni lyn… ung diary nya and isang sulat nya…. Damn damn damn! Hndi ko p kc cgrdo kung isesend ko nga b s knya to, wla lng, kc, at the last page of her diary, well actually it wsnt the l;ast page really, ah bsta! Sbi nya, slat daw me dun s diary nya… wla lng … I juz thought that maybe, inmstead of writing to her diary, why don’t I just send this, yes you! My diary to her? damn!, and snce the possblity of that hppning is vry close to reality, hndi ko msbi ung kung ano man ang ssbhin ko straight from myslf, alm m un? Kc xmpre dba?, bbshin ng iba?, so, im thinking of tmpring w/ what I really intemnd to say, juz bcause, someone is ought to read it, someone vrty spcial, som1 who I know would be affcted by whatever is written here. Argh! Damnit dmanit! I hate this hatehatehate! I always hate it when I encounttr this kind of filing, ung tipong, ang hrap mag isip? ang hrap mag decision? Alm m un?! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh! Hmmm.. can I pause for a break?…………………………… damn it. Ok, ive olredy dcided, tommorow k n lng isslat ung about kay lyn at about sking freaking buhay pagibig, argh!, for now, mas madami pang mga bagay… ay grabeh! Escoda n partio ang ksma ko!, genesis, micheal, edel, duncan, rombel, typos may singit, hahah ang sama, si wilmer yup!, that boy from aquino, ewn ko nga ba, na ligaw ata, we guys wouyld often go to peralkta ogether to play MU, there we spent not only our money(our parnts money rhter) but also prcious time luking at the computer, then aftrwrds, we would go outside and eat kikiam courtesy of micheal, yeah this past few days, medu bmlgtad ang mundo, si micheal ang nangllbre… hay… juz lyk ol tyms… kya lng kc nun, ako nmn ang may sagot, mag gegenerals kme, tpos paglabas, kain at kwenthuan sa labas, sa saktong lugar kung san kmi kumkain ngaun… yung badjao? Hay! Si micheal C. iniignore k, wla lng, I guess trip ko lng, msma ako eh, si marianne? Ok lng, most outstndnig ng aquino, si cmille? I heard she made it to top2 during the last counting of strs 4 the SY. An dami ng nagbago.. sbra…pro hinestly, I really miss bdjao so much, as in promise, I oftn wish n sna hndi n lng ako tmnda, n sna time ddnt pssed n lng, last day nga, si mam myles nkta ko sa campus, un ok lng nmn, mhba n ang buhok, at un, hay, nag huramentado nnman ako, hahah, nkkmis nmn tlga eh… buti n lng andjan si edel, we would share w/ each other the good old’ days, back at fleming, bdjao, and everything that came to be known as “past”. Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay… ngayung lingo ang clearnce week, wla akong pinasaynan, kc una d k mhglap ang clrnce slip ko 2nd nung nkta ko nmn, tnmad n kong mag pasign kya un… Ii also have doubts wheter ill make it to the tops this year, but one thing’s for sure, hnde ako ksma sa rcgnition, kc may 79 ako s card, nkka frustrate kya…………………………………………………………………………………………….. sobrang nahihiya na ko s fmily ko, kay daddy, kay mommy…. Msydo kcng nag xpct si mommy n mkkkuwa ako ng medal this year… prsonally, I blame ysabel for this, and of course I also blame myself, kc last quarter oo nga top1 ako, kya lng kc 79 ang grade ko s chem, , d ako nkpagpasa ng ntbk, si ysbel nmn, sya ang naggrade sa project nmen, indvidual grade ba, e filing ko, sinbotahe nya, wla lng… you cant blame me if dats how I think, she has the motives and shes got the ncssry stuff to brng me down, s bgay kung ako nga din nmn un, bbaan k din grade nya, pro khit na, its juzt so unfair…so unfair… nkkhya tlga, promise, na hihiya tlga ko kay daddy…. Ay! I also made friends w/ eleen! Yeay! Hahaha, ung curte na “batang” un, hahaha, actually, close n tlga kmi, blak k nga syang twgan ngaun aftr dis Iwe have a lot of things to talk about… ang cute kya nya, hahah!. Si kuya nga pla, nasa debut ni pheobe daw un, hahaha, ung gift b nmn skin ni ate oda last xmas, un daw ang ibbgay nya kay pheobe, hahah!, prng timang, e bukas n kya un, e kc d k p nmn sncra ung wrpper. Hahahaha.nga pla, dis summer ill be taking up review classes pra sa UPCAT, haaay now its our turn to take the mosty dreadful test there is! Hahaha, at least for now. Hmm… ano p nga ba diary?, si daddy tmnwag khpon, nag kaus kmi ng “msnsnan” haha!, un.. magppdla n daw sya dis wik. Argh! Damn! I still cant consentrarte!, her diary’s in front me right now, im looking at it.. and prti ko syang naalala!, nkkainis, dbale, bkas, sususlat ako ule, doon hmm?, ssbhn ko n lhat, and hndi ko ippbsa to sknya.. tama, and bsyds, intrsdo b sya? Ha! I doubt it! I hnstly doubt it…. Ytama gnon n lng… ha! Hmm?.. ceg un n muna, I still have to cntmplate on some things, I have to go now, ill write agin to you tommorw, dats a prmse, J bye! Cge! Bye!
- Ivan
Posted at Tuesday, June 29, 2004 by onivelnyu
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A promise is a promise, im back! Ha! I promiosed yestrday that ill be writing here again today, so, here it is!. Oh well… what a day, hahahah! Ginastos ko ung pera na dpat kay kuya (P200) hahah!. Ganito kasi un, pnta ko knna sa skul, finally may napapirmahan din ako! Haha, pnrmahan ni maam pararuan ung clearance ko, hehehe, la lng, tpos un, dumating si genesis, ah! Nga pola, dmating din knna si althea yup! That smart funny girl! Haha, nsa PCU phlippine chrstian unversty ata un n kc sya ngaun, actually khpon, galing n din sya ng skul, kya lkng di kami ngkta, e un, may binalikan pla sya sa rgstrars office, form 137 daw ata un, kya un,m bmlik sya, ngkta kmi, nga pla, knna ung rcognition day, wla lng… waaaah! Im still frstated ctually mxed feelings, ikaw b nmn!, nkkhya nga kay mommy eh, e pno b nmn, bumili n pla sya ng damit nya, and bgo kong uniform thinkng na aakyat ako ng stage and mag ssbit sya ng medal, nkkhiya kya s knya, I know she felt veeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrry disaapointed, although she dindt showed much, all she said was that I try again nxt yr daw, un, wla lng…. Knna nga pla, tnxt kjo si ianne pra I congratulate, haaaay, buti pa sya. Argh!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 nkakainz tlga!. Tpos un, dmting si edel, sinmahan kong mghnp ng CD na ipapasa nya kay sir dela cruz, ang arte kc, bngay n ni dncan ung CD nya kay edel, encyclopedia na 2002, pag dting ng skul, sbi ni “jack Bauer”(we njoi calling him dat, from the charctr in the TV series 24) kailngan daw 2004! E sus!, pra 2 yrs ang agwat! No b nman un!, pnta mmi phlcoa, pnta kmi SM, sgot ko pmshe lahta, in trhe end, wla din kming nhnap and un din ang pnsa ni edel, kc ang mga nasa SM, CDs worth P3000 hahahah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, edi kmi ni gnx, dncan at ako, nglro kmi s prlta, while tong si edel, bmlik dun sa skul para ipasa kay jack bauer yung CD, tpos mag papirma ng clearnce kay ma san migeul, haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay, half way through our game(BR) edel arrived accompanied by rombel, damn! They were very happy saying that wla n slang prblema and, mag 4-4th year sila, hahahaha, nttwa nga ko kay edel, kc, nung sumali na sya sa game nmin, he was lyk thnking me and dncan evry now and then dhil daw sa mga naitulong daw nmin s knya, kung di daw dhil smin di daw sya mkkpag 4th yr. Ahahahahah!. Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay buhay… la lng….. kc knnang naglalro me ng BR, naalala ko lng yung “good ol’ days” back at fleming and bdjao….. haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay. Nkkmis kya tlga….. nwei, lyf sucks bigtime!. Hahaha. As I was crossing the overpass here at phlcoa, I realized how lucky I am that I get pass through 3rd year, it made me very thankful that unlyk others in our batch, I wont be listening to the same lessons again next year as I eneter school, and unlike others, I don’t have last minute regerts. Damn! How lucky I am!, it seems that I havent realized that before, oh well… thank you god, really, thank you so much! For all the blessings a million thanks. Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay……… you know what, Im beginning to miss her oredy….. not less than 24 hrs. and here I am being sentimental…… honestly, I wsnt xpecting that id be feeling this way. It’s not that I don’t love her anymore or anything to tha effect, its just that, a week or so before she lwft, we havent been talking much, and I just let it pas, because, I thought that maybe in doing so, im alrady getting used to having her presence not felt.., lam mo un?, prang sinanay ko na, or hinanda ko n ung srili ko, pra at least pag alis nya, hndi ako gntong naghuhuramentado, but I guess its really diff. Now that I know that she really is gone, I can’t reach her on the phone, neither on SMS, iba p din pla tlga. Haaaaaay… I just hope she’s having a good time there at taiwan, hope she’s enjoying herself. Haaaaaaaay….. can’t wait to chat with her again on Saturday.….. hahaha! A funning thing happened p nga pla ysterday, it goes likes this, every moring, it has become a habbit of mine to wake up at around 6 in the moring, switch on the radio to AM station, and then sleep again, I dunno, but the vry instant I opened the radio, the news guy was rprting that may brownout daw sa NAIA and nadami daw passengers na delay ang flight, nataw 2lkoy ako, and pgdting ko s skul, I mentionmed that to julio and he said that he also heard bout that on the radion in the cab they were riding, hahaha, a thought ran in my mind, ano kayang itsura dun ni shrlyn sa airport? Hahah!, wlang aircon, sangkatutak ang tao, at na delay ang flight nya sgoro 4 alsmot 2hours or so, and to think na hndi n ata yun na2klog, and as erly as 11pm, plang e ndun n sila, hahahah. Naawa tuloy ako sa tao. As I wtched the evning news, I learned that the power outage ouccred at aorund 230 in the moring, I said to myself, 230in the morning???? DamN! Juzt 30 minutes away from shirlyn’s scheduled flight, hahahaha, poor girl, she must have felt vry pissed off. Hahahahaha. Oh well….. yeah I know, ive mentioned julio, um… after reading lyn’s diary… I really understand what Julio’s role is, haaaaaaaaaaaaay, actually, andami kong naiintndhan aftr reading ol the stuff she left me(btw, nkkinz, kgbi kc, un nga, bnbsa ko ung diary I lyn, and guess what, I ran into a picture taken, during the cheering competition last SY, den I suddnly rmbbred, I was seating at “his” and her back when the picture was taken, oh welll, wla lng, it juz brought back memories of b4, wla lng!….)nwei un, I really feel very s2pid, I dunno, actually I don’t know how to say what Im feeling ryt now, after reading her stuff(the letter and the diary), nga pla, julio asked me erlier at the school, kung no daw nklgay dun s sulat, eh since na may ppnthan p ko, I 1st asked him if he wants to read the stuff himself, to save me time of xplainig evryrthing to him, and he said yes, kya I promised to give it to him, after kong mnggling sa faculty, actually, the reason I said that(promising to give him the stuff later in the day, eventhough I cud have just gven it to him right there and den) was because aside from not wanting him to read wat is wrten in there, I also wasn’t sure if shrlyn would want him to read the lette(argh!, julio’s her bstfrnd ofcourse its alright w/ her!)oh well… I dunno… oh yeah!, there’s this weird thing, I juz wsnt sure bout this though, but I think I heard julio seying sorry to me, umm.. when was dat?, ystrday ata o ngaun, bsta un, e alm m nmn si julio, 70% of wat he says I undrstnd, and the remaining 30%, mumble n lng ang dting skin, dunno, mybe bcause of his braises(is that how yyou spell the word nweia?)? nwei, eh yun.. damn! Why cant I just love her as a friend! Damn damn damn damn! I really haet lyf! Lif eis sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo unfair, why cant I juzt be like julio, bket sobrang mahal ko tyong taong to, bkit bkit bkit?????????????????????. Damn . maybe because I let my self fall for her, hinayaan kong umasa, mangarap at magakalang mhal din nya ko gaya ng pagmamahal ko sknya, looking back in the past, ung last summer, evrytym we wud talk to each other on the phone, send txt mssgas to each other,. Nagun k n alala kung gno ko tlga sya mnhal nung mga pnhon n un, and I kip asking myslf, aftr reding her diary, why cant I juzt love her as a friend? DamN! She loves me, no doubt bout that, but only as a friend(she made that clear a thousand times b4), why cant I just reciprocate that kind of affection to her?, she desrve that doesn’t she,?. she doesn’t desrve to hear a single thing I have told her, its like a torture to her, hearing me tell her how much I love her, I love her w/ all my heart, how I long 4 the day that I cud tell my self that she was finally mine, all those things, damn!. If only I have loved her as a friend, then all of these should have not happened, if only my feelings for her were the same as her feelings for me! Why does it have to be like this, damn.. last Monday, the week started really good for me, I get to spend some time w/ her alone, went here at bliss to rest for sometime thenwe left ofr UP, (needless to say, I even had a hard-on as we were about to leave mama erlin’s place), we even went to SM north after that!, I was so happy then, the next day wasn’t much of a deiffrnce, I was in high spirits then, pero kung gano ka ganda nagsimula ang linggo sya nmng kalungkot nitong natapos, hay!, hndi kme nkpagsuap, back to the “was she there?” attitude of me, I ignred her, pass her by w/o even saying hi, It was preety lame actually. The next few days before she left we didn’t get to talk to each other anymore, I was hoping that maybe she was going to chat last Saturday, so I tried my luck, she wasn’t there.. Before, my problem was how to tell her about my true feelings, now im facing a much greater challenge, that is how to love her only as a frind n lng so dat both of us could sleep peacefully at night knowing that we have a real friend in each other. (damN! I just received her txt!, hahahah{now im luaghing!}, she asked me to greet kuya a happy bday for her, cause Ironically, her sister, that is swanee, is also clbrating her 18th bday today! Haha). Now I really hate myself for all this. Damn damn damn. Im going to bed having two questions on my mind, why the hell cant I just love her as a friend? And secondly, can I? This has been the longest entry I ever did since I dtarted writing, oh well, life sucks. Big time. Mama erlin had just entered the room, so I have to go now, I cant go on wrting here knowing that somebody else might eredaing what im writing, hahah!, oh well, im closed to finishing my entry anyway, so I have to go now diary, bye ok?, sensya na, msydong ma drama ko. Ahaha!. Cge, bye!
- Ivan
Posted at Tuesday, June 29, 2004 by onivelnyu
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